Dear me at 18:
I realize that he seems so different from the boys you know.
He’s a man, from a bigger town, already graduated from college. His clothes are polished, his music taste different from anyone you know. I know that you play Scrabble together, and you warm his bed many nights a week. I know that he’s introduced you to things you couldn’t have imagined.
Here’s the thing: he will never call you his girlfriend. He will never introduce you to his friends. He may say he wants to move away with you, make plans with you. It’s not going to happen. Don’t get your hopes up.
He will cut ties with you, to be with someone much older than you. Don’t let yourself believe in him. It’s not worth the pain and confusion you will continue to feel even six years later.
J spends her time listening to music, reading romance novels and trying not to remember that jerk from her past.